Conversation: Rebecca Thomson filmmaker
1. Your biggest rock bottom/crying on a floor time in your life.
Definitely the death of my own mother, Fay, has been the most profoundly sad and challenging time of my life. I’ve always had a very close and easy relationship with my mother and watching her have to deal with the physical and mental pain of being extremely ill from cancer was very distressing. As mothers so often do she tried to protect us, her children and loved ones, from that pain that she was feeling, but we could see it.
2. Today what would you tell yourself at your lowest point?
I don’t know that there is anything that I could say to myself or have done differently that would make that a less difficult time. The sadness, pain and loss that I felt, and indeed still feel at times, is proportionate to the great love that we had for our mother and that she had for us. I don’t regret loving my mother that much, and therefore I have to accept the great pain that follows the loss of her. I reflect on how lucky that I and my siblings are to have had such a beautiful person raise us and to show us how to be a good parent.
3. The most healing tool/practice you found.
For me I find healing in moving forward, in planning, in being engaged with other human beings, with my family, with creative projects, with community. I am someone who is happiest when scheming new projects, having ideas and getting to interact with other people.
4. The most humbling moment you have ever experienced.
I actually found my recent 40th Birthday a very humbling and moving experience, which I wasn’t expecting. I just had so many friends make the effort to come celebrate with me, say the loveliest things to me, give me very meaningful gifts including an amazing stop motion claymation that some of my oldest friends in the world made for me. That was AMAZING! I just felt completely enveloped by love and a deep appreciation for what a delightful community of humans I have around me.
5. When was the moment you felt adequate and told yourself ‘You know what? I’m actually good at what I do!’ ?
Oh that’s a difficult one. I think that’s something that can change every day! I think I had a bit of a ‘lost’ time of my life in my twenties where my life did not seem to be going according to my grand plan and I had a strong sense that I was ‘wasting’ my life. I lost my direction. In retrospect what I think I lost was my creative practice. I’ve realised now that I am someone who thrives from being creative but also from being busy and deeply involved with life.
Since I got into filmmaking, which was after my first baby, I’ve been far happier than ever before. I’m still very much on a learning path with filmmaking and hope I always will be (the learning is endless!), but I love the creative process in all sorts of ways and I love that it brings me into the sphere of all sorts of other interesting people.
I have also only recently, got to the point where I feel comfortable stepping into the role of filmmaking mentor, where I think I have experience and wisdom that I can offer someone else.
6. The limiting belief you are still working on today.
I think I am working on being brave. On accepting that I am not always going to feel adequate, or that I might fail but trying not to let that stop me from saying ‘yes’ to a great opportunity or from putting myself forward.
7. If you would have a billboard with millions of viewers what would you say on it (slogan, quote, expression - not a commercial agenda)?